Shifting Blame

This week I had to go to the Post Office to mail some Christmas gifts. While there, I overheard one of the postal workers and a man discussing his lost package. Essentially the root of their discussion was the fact that a man had a package that was delivered to the post office, but when he came to pick it up with his slip and his id, they told him that someone had already picked up that particular package with the slip. However, that wasn't entirely possible since he had the slip with him.

Instead of admitting that they had made a mistake, or even saying that they were sorry, the postal employee just kept telling him how someone from that address or someone having that slip must have picked up the package. The man's response was that no one else lived at that address, as it was a home he lived in alone, and no one else could have had the slip since he had it in his possession now.

This went on for several minutes, and I could feel myself becoming more and more disappointed in the postal service, as it seemed that all this man wanted was clear direction as to what to do next and an apology. After he left, without either of these things or a package, two other postal workers applauded the first for the way she handled the situation - there were just too many things that could have went wrong - the package being misfiled, mishandled, mislabeled, misdelivered. And to say that they were sorry, without really knowing what happened, would make them liable, as an apology is an admission of guilt.

We live in a culture that is marked by two types of people - those that refuse to say that they are sorry and expect any blame, and those who except blame that is no theirs to bear. Seemingly gone are the people who say they are sorry when they are at fault and lead others to become better people by accepting their apologies and seeking reconciliation and forgiveness when others are at fault. We have been so consumed about protecting ourselves or protecting others that the art of apology is long gone.

As a pastor, I cannot help but wonder how this spills over into people's spiritual life. Has our culture of protecting one's self made it impossible for people to seek reconciliation with God? If we cannot say we are sorry to each other, cannot admit our own guilt, can we do so to God? My guess is probably not. We are so conditioned to be unapologetic or over apologetic that we probably display this same behavior with God. Which breaks my heart. Have we so forgotten who we are and whose we are that we taint our relationships with one another beyond repair? I pray that this is not the case, and that we begin to say we are sorry and truly mean it when we are to blame, instead of making excuses or blaming others. And I pray that when someone else is to blame that we allow them to say they are sorry instead of taking the blame away from them and onto ourselves, preventing them from growing in Christ.