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My heart beats for love. I want to be different. I want to be who I am called to be. WORTHY and LOVED!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Practically Perfect - Matthew 5: 38-48

I’m a bit of a Broadway fanatic. Recently I went to see Mary Poppins in the city with a friend to celebrate her birthday. While I think Julie Andrews is an amazing actress, Disney’s Mary Poppins was far from my favorite movie; in fact I thought it down right scary at times. Perhaps that could be attributed to the fact that I found Mary to be a bit over-bearing and unhappy in her demeanor. So imagine my surprise when Mary is a cheerful nanny who introduces herself to the children by singing “Practically Perfect”, in which she declares, “I’m practically perfect in every way.”

Mary’s statement gives us a lot to think about as we approach today’s text. Jesus seems to be laying out an impossible task – to be perfect as God is perfect. And oh how we’ve abused this verse and the proverbial statements that precede it. We’ve created an image of perfection in our heads that few would even want to obtain –nonsensical, prudish, unimaginative, and perhaps even gruff. Someone who doesn’t smile or laugh or have fun. As a United Methodist, one of the tenants of our tradition is that we are moving on towards perfection, but if these characteristics mark perfection it is most certainly not who I want to be, nor is it who I wish to lead people to discover as their pastor.

Yet isn’t that all to often how we envision God? Aloof, lacking a sense of humor, asking us to strive for something never to be reached. Further, these commands that Jesus give are unattainable at best and damning at worst. They seem to point out everything that we fail to be in our walk with God: forgiving, charitable, and unconditionally loving. As we note our own failures in these areas, our tendency is either to dismiss God as being irrational, which can perhaps explain the exodus of young people from our congregations, or to over-correct our behavior. We abuse God’s commands in order to make ourselves feel humble, even if our zeal for perfection is misguided.

Think back to New Testament 101. Roman rule, like Jewish law, was based on an honor-shame society. You were judged by your actions, as well as your families. “But if anyone strikes you on the right cheek, turn also the other.” This verse has been construed as Jesus saying that we should subject ourselves to shame and abuse at the hands of another. But how many of us are quelling this misperception by teaching a bit of history to our congregations – that to turn the left cheek to be slapped would require the victim to reclaim their honor as if stating that one slap alone could not shame them. Further, the hand positioning is key. The striker cannot backhand slap the person with his or her right hand. The only other option would be to punch the person with a fist, and punching and slapping are not the same thing. To slap shows power, while to punch affirms someone as an equal. Turning and offering the left cheek resulted in a quandary for the person who originally slapped the individual that would ultimately cause her or his shame, not the person’s being slapped.

Yet, how many of us share this brief history lesson? And if we are not, we must ask why. Perhaps if we would, this verse would not be one used by victims of domestic violence to justify staying with their partners. Perhaps it would make us rethinking our reaction to evil – it is not passive, but active. Perfection is not passive or unimaginative. It calls for us to think outside of the constrains of our culture in order to put forth a radical message of resistance.

In America we are really good at giving people what they do not need and ignoring what they ask for. In other words we give people what we think they need. Once again a history lesson. Who would be sued for a coat? Probably not a rich person with many coats, but someone on the edge of being destitute, who has lost everything else in life and thus only has one thing worth being brought to court for. The article of clothing that acted as a lifeline, acting as a blanket, shelter, and storage area. And now someone else wants to take it away to repay an impossible debt. Imagine the shame! Yet, Jesus commands that the person being asked for their coat to give their cloak – or undergarment – as well. In other words, you would be naked. This would not be to your shame, as the debtor, but to the one who was suing you, as you handed over your coat and cloak while everything else hung out. Once again it is nothing short of an active way of speaking out against injustice. Perfection has a sense of humor to it, and most certainly is not prudish or stingy, as we are admonished to “give to everyone who begs from you and do not refuse anyone who wants to borrow from you.”

We live in a hyper-rational world that asks for us to examine where our monetary gifts will go before handing it out. But for me the command to give to everyone who begs from you came alive on the streets of St. Kilda’s, Victoria in Australia. St. Kilda’s is the unsafe neighborhood in the entire providence. It is marked by IV drugs, prostitution, rape, murder, theft, and alcohol abuse. But when approached for money when entering a local restaurant for dinner, my traveling campaign did not think twice before digging into his wallet and giving the local man the largest bill he could find. We met the man after getting dessert, to find that he was too inebriated to recognize either of us as he once again pleaded for money. This time my friend walked with him to the bus in order to pay his fare to get him home. When I asked my friend if he was disappointed with how his money had been spent, he profoundly said that love gives first and asks questions later. Perfection is not bound by the restraints of worry.

Because at the end of the day, Jesus’ commands boil down to the idea of loving your enemies, those whom you would not normally associate with. This is a derivative of loving your neighbor as yourself from Leviticus 19. Or in the translation of Dr. Fewell, “love your neighbor who is like you”. Jesus is reminding us that not only the people we consider to be our neighbors like us, but our enemies as well. Perfection is not about separating ourselves from people, but looking another human being in the eye and seeing the piece of Divine love that lead to their creation. And when we see that Divine spark it should be harder to bring that person shame. It is easy to love those we like, but it is moving towards perfection when we begin to love those we do not like, those whom we have built a wall between in order to keep ourselves from becoming contaminated in our minds.

Jesus effectively took the entire concept of who God is and what it means to be perfect like God and turned it on its head. It goes against what it means to be set apart and spiritual. It bucks the idea that God has to be fair. It also stands up to the notion that perfection is passive. For in the words of Mary Poppins, “I didn’t say I was fair, I said, I’m practically perfect and here’s my aim, by the time I leave here you both will be the same, you’ll be practically perfect… in every way.”

God does not call us to be stingy, judgmental, and boring. This is not the perfection we are moving towards. Like Mary Poppins with the Bank’s children, God wants us to reach into our imaginations and rethink what it means to live being our best possible selves. As current leaders, I ask you, what are we trying to make perfection into in our churches? Can we accept laughter, joy, and creativity as part of the spiritual disciplines that mark moving towards perfection? Can we envision perfection as radical resistance to a culture trying to restrain us? Or are we going to settle to preach misguided notions of the boring passivity perfection is perceived to be, instead of what being practically perfect truly is? Perhaps when we set aside our ideas about perfection for God’s, we will see that perfection is a bit more achievable and is much more exciting. That is something I am thrilled to move towards and preach. Being practically perfect. Amen.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Growing Spirituality - 1 Cor 3: 1-9

We all have those sweet spots where our thinking seems clearer and our imagination runs wild. For me – that place currently is my car, driving back and forth from school. Random thoughts just seem to emerge. This weeks reflection worth dwelling on was how much I struggle with the verse in Ecclesiastes 3 that there is a time for everything under heaven. Oh how we’ve screwed this verse up. It’s been abused to justify war, violence, and oppression. But it has been equally as harmful when it is neglected – when we think that everyone should be at the same place we are along the journey of life or when we rush through seasons of time.

Enter Paul. Paul is writing to those feuding in Corinth. And in trying to simplify and convey a message to a struggling people he makes a grave mistake that has marked our Christian lives throughout history – he forms a dichotomy between the world and the Spirit. Before we go attacking Paul for his choice of rhetorical techniques lets be honest – we’ve all done what Paul id here in the past. In order to short cut an argument or simplify a point, we reduce it to either or. By applying labels and simplifying arguments, we make life a bit more manageable. You are either a republican or a democrat. Pro life or pro choice. Good or bad. Poor or rich. With this simplification comes assumptions about what that label entails. For Paul, worldly is reduced too not good, mediocre and spiritual is living in perfection. But there are a whole slew of possibilities and nuisances in between the polarities.

I’m not a mother and have not spent much time caring for infants – but in my limited knowledge I know that there is a point in time when you give both solid food and milk, because neither satisfies fully. And honestly, I think that is where a lot of us are living today – in the both-and world. This is where our season lies. Our lives cannot be reduced to spiritual or not. And even in all of our vigor for God, there are still times when we stumble.

And here is where I think Paul really messed it up for us today. Paul seems to want everyone to be at the same stage of life – not acknowledging that this may not be their season in particular. He seems to make being worldly an equivalent with failure, but failure is not something to be ashamed of – it can be fruitful. No matter how Spiritual we are there are still going to be seasons when we do not live up to our own expectations or the expectations of others. But not living up to someone’s expectations or cleanly fitting into their dichromatic way of living does not mean that God does not redeem that time.

Let’s pretend for a moment that the Corinthian were not struggling with issues amongst their community or even arguing. What would have been lost and what would have been gained? I think that we, as 21st CE readers may not have been able to find life in their struggles. If it didn’t seem eventful enough to warrant a letter, the wisdom gained from their experience would have been lost to us. They may have gained peace, but at the loss of knowing that our struggles with growing spiritually, as individuals and as a community, are not unique.

At the end of the day, what the Corinthians were arguing about – the thing that lead Paul to label them as worldly is not as important as the fact that it happened. Because I’m sure we can think of some of our own disagreements to substitute in. But we can recognize our journey along the lines of the Corinthian community. We aren’t always going to have it together. And that’s okay. It’s part of life. Because at the end of the day, growth doesn’t come from simple moments of perfection.

Think back on your life. When have you grown the most spirituality? I know for myself, it has been in times of deep valleys and redeemed decisions. When I’m doing well and everything seems to be going fine, I have a tendency to think that I can do things on my own – which is a sure fire way to take God out of the picture and recess spirituality. It may be hard to believe that God can take our dark moments and petty arguments and bring about significant growth, but God can.

And while Paul may have missed the idea of redeeming every moment, his example is key to our understanding of growth. For most seedlings growth comes from falling to the ground or being planted deep under ground until under the right conditions, the seed begins to break open from the inside out. Talk to any gardeners you know – while you may be able to predict when seedlings should begin to grow, that time line is not always accurate. Further, just because one seedling becomes something edible or begins to bloom does not mean that all of the others will follow it’s suit in the same day.

When I was little I remember asking if we could have a garden. For some reason my grandpa and dad gave into my request, but I don’t think any of us realized how much work it would be. We were out in the soil almost every day, laboring, and even then our yield was mediocre at best. But I don’t know if any of our labors can be compared to that of the seeds and bulbs that we planted. We tended to them, but growth came from and through them.

What a metaphor with double meaning for us today. First, it reminds us that each of us is responsible for our own spiritual journey, but we are under the care of God. And that spiritual growth can some times be painful – resulting from being in the darkness before changing from the inside out.

But the metaphor also reminds us that at the end of the day, our spiritual life is moment by moment. God may call for us to tend to someone for a period of time before entrusting their care to someone else. I don’t know about you, but there have been more influences on my spiritual growth then I can even begin to name. There are people who I never realized have influenced me in the way they have. But they are part of my story. For many of us, we think the end result of our spiritual growth is saving people for Christ or seeking justice for those Christ loves in the world. The frustrating thing is that we may never get recognition for what we’ve done or even know how a person is doing after we minister to their spirit, because we were only a part of their story. However, just as God cares for each of our growth, so does God oversee the growth of those we touch.

For we live in a world of seasons, not polarities, of journeys and not ultimatums. And God’s got this. Do not become frustrated with yourself for not being where you would like to be spirituality. God’s got this. Do not judge others for not being where you would like them to be spirituality, like Paul was with the Corinthians. Because God’s got that too. Spiritual growth is about trusting God to redeem and use those moments in our lives that we thought were beyond repair. It’s about finding something good, even amongst those things that are “worldly”. It’s about living each moment with patient anticipation of how God is on the move in and through your life. It’s about not boxing yourself in to what you think the Spiritual life should be like. It’s about a journey through seasons of life that cannot be rushed, but must be embraced in the fullness of what they bring – for we never stop growing in the faith. We never stop being tended to by God. AMEN

Monday, February 7, 2011

The Role of the Pastor

I was in Petco on Saturday getting a few things for Angelo, my new Tortoise, when one of my parishioners called me with troubling news. Apparently I looked devastated, as the clerk asked if it was a hard conversation. I was taken aback by my response that I'm a pastor so all of the calls I get are hard.
But its true. People don't call the pastor when things are going well. I rarely get an office visit for anything short of dramatic changes or huge traumatic life issues. I wish that pastors could be more involved in the totality of people's lives and not just the ugly, dramatic moments.

Politics of the Church

For the past week, I've spent many hours thinking about different questions that BOOM may ask next month at my ordination interview. I feel comfortable about all of the possibilities except for the "life issues section". I think I'm worried that these questions are going to turn out to be more about the churches political stance on issues, which are more matters of opinion then doctrine, polity, or political realities.
Some of the ones I'm worried about are: what are you views on premarital sex, abortion, LGBTQIQA ordination or marriage. To name a few.
For the past two weeks a lot of issues have been in the news about "Christian" views - chief of which involved the redefining of rape by the GOP to back-door in pro-life legislation that would not allow any government monies to go towards abortions that those who are raped by incest or in a date rape to be used. I don't think this is the "Christian" view. There isn't one view that can be ascribed to followers of Christ, especially when the Bible doesn't clearly state an opinion one way or another (at least not with good exegesis behind it).
Yet, coming from a conservative conference, I'm worried that I will be judged for my opinions that reflect more of my own personal exegesis then what I would preach or teach. And that is my biggest fear.

You are Blessed - Matthew 5: 1-12

One of my choice phrases to end correspondences with is “Be blessed to be a blessing.” But the sentence and its sentiments are both tricky. It raises more questions for me then kind thoughts. What does it mean to be blessed? What does it mean to be a blessing to someone else?

Apparently the English language is just as confused about what to make of the word bless, having no less than fourteen different definitions for it including seemingly polar meanings including to give a benediction to (with the example being that of death) and to confer a sign of prosperity or happiness on. Other definitions include making the sign of the cross over someone in order to call on God for protection, to concentrate, to praise or glorify, and to invoke blessings upon.

Now with all of the uncertainty of this loaded word we turn to today’s gospel passage. Often when we think of the Sermon on the Mount we mix in what we have been taught over the years about a similar passage in the gospel of Luke known as the sermon on the plain. While the sermon in Luke is full of woes as well as blessings, Matthew focuses solely on blessings. And while the sermon in Luke is preached to a great crowd, this passage is not. When Jesus saw the crowds he turned away going up the mountain. This was not so more people could see and hear his teachings. No, it was because he wanted a moment of intimacy with those closest to him, his disciples. When the small group had gathered and sat together, he began to teach them.

In the intimacy of that moment, Jesus turned everything they had been taught through their upbringing in Jewish scripture and oral traditions. Blessed are those who are poor in spirit, for theirs in the Kingdom of Heaven. I can only imagine how absurd this sounded to those gathered at Jesus feet. In ancient Judaism there wasn’t a concept of the Kingdom of Heaven. There was God who created the Heavens, meaning the sky and everything beyond it, but the notion of God’s everlasting reign as something that people could be co-creators in just didn’t exist. Further, there would be questions surrounding the timing of this Kingdom of Heaven, for the concept of an afterlife, a Heaven that one goes to after perishing, wasn’t common. The best way to be blessed was to be wealthy and have many offspring, things that are tangible in the present moment, the now. And what is this poor in Spirit that Jesus speaks of? Generally those who are poor need to be taken care of by the community – how does that apply to the spirit?

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Well known amongst the Jewish community would be the story of Job that begs to ask why some people suffer and what God’s idea of comforting anyone is or should be? Who really wants to mourn? Especially when you only mourn when you loose something or someone truly dear to your heart. Is the pay off of being comforted really worth the pain of that which caused you to mourn?

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. In a society that is waiting for a Messiah, waiting for a conquering King that would rescue them from the oppressive rule of the Romans, what is the benefit of being meek? And who would want a meek King? Further you have this idea of inheritance – something that is bequeathed to you upon the death of someone else. Inheritances do not come suddenly, but after a long period of waiting – so how long must one wait to inherit the earth?

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. When you hunger and thirst for something – there is a process. What you crave is something that you want deep within, but something that has yet to be fulfilled. Like an inheritance, how long will you have to wait to be filled?

Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive the mercy. Like being meek, one does not really want to be a person who receives mercy. To bestow mercy shows power – the ability to hold something over someone, but to receive mercy – to receive that which is not deserved, involves admitting that you did something wrong. Is this truly a blessing?

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Seeing God is not necessarily a good thing. Those who have seen God’s face will perish immediately.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Peace making has been called one of the most difficult task. This is not peace keeping; this is creating something that does not exist out of the chaos of dissent. The name Yahweh up until this point in history has not even been associated with peace; the name was recognized by surrounding peoples as a God of war. Throughout scriptures we have seen Israel fighting everyone for things ranging from conquest, to revenge, and family squabbles. Yet, peacemakers will be called the children of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. And there is the pesky reoccurring idea of the kingdom of heaven. Who really wants to be persecuted? What makes this statement even more humorous is that Jesus is speaking to the disciples who have been born out of the minority of the Jewish culture, persecuted by Roman rule and picked on by tribes that far out number then. The entire community is persecuted. And yet, Jesus is foretelling that there is more persecution to come. More sufferings to be taken on for God.

So are these blessings really what we think of for blessings? Are these things that we would wish upon those dear to us? Our family? Our children? Our friends?

Yet these blessings, which would signal the least and the last of society, are things to be rejoiced over. That takes the entire idea of blessings even further – not only are you to accept this contrary way of life, but you are to recognize it as a blessing and rejoice in it. How strange! How seemingly impossible.

If you were a disciple hearing this message for the first time, how would you react? We’ve taken something so radical and have beaten it to the point of familiarity and sanitation. Jesus is telling the disciples to be radical people, living a way that will be recognized as not strange. It’s living in such a way that prompts questions from those around us. It is living intentionally in such a way that prepares the disciples for the more shocking blessing yet to come – the resurrection of Jesus Christ!

One of my professors tells the story that every time he goes out in public – even to buy something as simple as socks for his feet – salespeople recognize him as a preacher. He is not a well-known man even inside the circle of the church, yet alone outside of its community. He does not wear a cross around his neck and he dresses like any other working person. But people recognize something inside of him that he cannot escape from – he is a preacher. Oh that we would live in such a way that those around us would know that we are Christians. Live is such a way that pushes aside the standards of blessing that the world holds – of popularity, wealth, and health, and pick up the radical cross and immerse ourselves in this peculiar way of living. A way that is just as peculiar today as it was when Jesus spoke it over the disciples sitting at his feet. Some may say that we are foolish. Others may say that it is impossible – but we know that it is not. For our Lord and Savior walked the very path of blessing that he laid out to be our example – to show us that it can be done. One step at a time – one blessing at a time. For you are blessed.