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My heart beats for love. I want to be different. I want to be who I am called to be. WORTHY and LOVED!

Monday, July 25, 2016

#healthypastor - Spiritually

  I come from a denomination that had a very important tradition of asking one another in small group gatherings "how is it with your soul?" I think we need to reclaim the time and space to honestly answer that questions - especially as pastors. How is it really with our souls?
  Far too many pastors I know neglect their own spiritual life as they care for the spirituality of others. The only devotional life they have to speak of revolves around preparing for Sunday's sermon and the only time they pray is when they are asked to do so publicly. When our spiritual lives are languishing as pastors, how can we be expected to lead others deeper in their relationship with God?
   Like exercise, I don't have a set devotionally schedule. The generally gist is doing a structured reading in the morning - but the time varies depending on the day, and a personal scripture reading in the evening. Currently, I am using A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals in the morning which has a guided time of prayer and singing, a psalter reading, and a new testament and old testament reading. I usually change the book I use for structured devotional time once a year, but for the time being I have been using this for two consecutive years because I really like it. Then in the evening I read one chapter from the Hebrew Scriptures and one chapter from the New Testament.
   We all need to find what works for us personally in terms of spiritual growth - we are all different so different types of readings appeal to us - but we each need to be doing something to tend to our own souls so that we can tend to others without our cups running spiritually dry.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

“A Servants Healing” Matt 8: 5-13

I attended a college that had a very clear goal - to develop scholar servants, also referred to at time as servant leaders. When we had our baccularette service the evening before commencement, each of us was presented with a towel, to remind us that Jesus modeled what it was like for us to be servant leaders when he washed the disciples feet. We were then sent out into the world to do the same. 
I think of that commissioning to go and serve every time I see that towel sitting in my office. But in today’s scripture text we find a servant leader in an unexpected place - in a centurion whose servant is sick. This story begins with a twist - it is not a servant who is coming to Jesus on behalf of his master, but instead a master, a leader of the Roman army, who was coming to Jesus on behalf of his servant. The centurion was modeling servant leadership by even coming to Jesus in the first place, because this servant was so sick that he need someone else to come to Jesus and plead his case for healing. 
Jesus, didn’t even bat an eye. His immediate response was that he would go with the centurion to see his servant and heal him. Healing with Jesus is a tricky thing. The centurion was asking that his servant’s body be physically healed from the distress that it was in - and it would seem that was certainly what Jesus went forth to offer - but God’s healing through Christ touches us in so many different ways. Jesus doesn’t just heal our bodies. Jesus can heal relationships. Can heal the way that we see ourselves as he frees us from past sins. Jesus can heal our present and our futures by reminding us that we are in Christ.
A few months ago I had the wonderful experience of participating in the Philipsburg-Osceola High School Baccularette service. The pastor giving the mediation kept encouraging the graduates and those present to seek out the good life - not necessarily the good life as the world defines it, where nothing bad every happens to you, and you are wealthy, and live the American dream - but the good life in Christ - where we are so centered in the Lord that we can get through whatever we may face. That is the type of healing and hope that Jesus offered, far above and beyond the physical healing that took place in his presence as well.
Jesus has agreed to go and do what the centurion has asked for - but then there is a twist. He declares that he is not worthy to even have Jesus come under his roof, so instead he encouraged Jesus to speak the word of healing over his servant right then in there. The centurion had so much trust, so much faith in Jesus, that he believed that he could bring healing across distances. Jesus has that much authority. 
A centurion would have commanded one-hundred foot soldiers in the Roman army. He had authority over their lives - so much so that he said go or come and they would respond accordingly. The centurion believed that Jesus had so much authority over disease and sickness that he could change everything with a single word.
Jesus was amazed at hearing these words. Here was a Roman, not a Jew, who understood the power of God. Here was a solider, who had his own authority over people’s lives and yet he understood faith better then others Jesus had encountered up to this point Here was one who would be worthy of anything he wanted, by the world’s standards, yet in all humility he recognized that he wasn’t worthy to have Jesus enter into this home. Here is someone who could have commanded anyone else to come and make this request on behalf of him, because he was that important, yet he came with a servant leaders heart to plead his case. He came and humbly asked Jesus to simply speak, and change this servants life. 
Friends, the centurion in today’s scripture treated Jesus with a level of respect and authority that I sometimes fear that we are missing today. He acted with a faith that is seen only in glimpses in our culture. Do we ascribe to Jesus the authority he is due, or do we only go to Jesus when it is a last resort? Do we live as if we believe that a simple word from Jesus can change our lives, or do we try to gain everything by our own strength and determination? Do we act as if Jesus has a say in our lives, let alone the ultimate say in our lives, or not?
I mentioned before that I attended the high school baccularette service, but perhaps one of my greatest joys came few days before that. Every year the miniterium offers a scholarship (and sometimes two) to students who write an essay based on a prompt given. This years prompt was about living out your faith, and we had seven applicants, more then we have ever had in years past. Each of those essays were filled with stories of Jesus directing these graduates lives as they tried to give their very all to the Lord, trusting that Christ would use them to change the world and believing that they were to serve him in all they do every day. That is faith. Some of the students went on to speak of Christ changing their lives and redeeming awful situations they encountered. That is faith. And the winner spoke of seeing miracles every day - that is faith. 
Maybe we don’t have the faith of the centurion but do we have the faith of these teenagers right here in our community? Do we strive to live by faith - giving Jesus control and praise? 
The funny thing about the faith of the centurion was that it wasn’t about knowing all the scriptures - he honestly probably knew very little, if any, as a Roman. It wasn’t about knowing all the God speak or theology about God or what Jewish people believed. His faith was about trusting in the power of Jesus and knowing that he had the authority to change things for his servant, so he risked himself in humbly asking Jesus to do so. 
And you know what  - Jesus did it! He spoke over the centurion’s servants life - which wasn’t his original plan - remember he was originally going to go and heal him face to face -  all because of the faith of this particular Roman. 
Brothers and Sisters, sometimes we miss the point. We can get so caught up in making sure that we believe the right thing, or that our God-speak in just right, that we miss the beauty of having the simple faith to trust Jesus. The simple faith to risk ourselves on behalf of others, both in action and prayer. We miss opportunities to be amazed by Jesus, because we don’t give him the authority that he is due. Let’s change that. Let’s step out in faith, on matters great and small, and give Christ our trust. Give Christ his authority instead of pretending that we have everything under control. Let’s praise God as Jesus breaks through barriers in our lives and the lives of others. Let’s pray for healing in this community. Let’s let Jesus be Jesus. Amen. 










Monday, July 18, 2016

#healthypastor - Relationships

   At annual conference this year we heard a wonderful sermon during the ordination service that made a great point - even the lone ranger wasn't actually alone. He had a side kick. He partnered with different agencies and local people. Yet, far too many pastors take pride in a different definition of being a lone pastor - actually being alone.
   We are made for relationships. It's in how God created us. For those who know me best, they know I'm an introvert. Sometimes I need to be alone for a short period of time in order to recharge, but I also need people. I need my prayer partners and my spiritual director. I need to talk to my best friends and family. I need to interact with people.
   But pastors can have another problem if they don't embrace the "alone ranger" mentality, they can also swing too far the other way and thing that their congregation members are their confidants and friends. This can be dangerous for a few different reasons. I love everyone in my congregation, but if I start to treat some people differently, acting like friends to some but not to all, some people feel left out and a divide starts to form in the church. Second, if I look for people in the congregation to constantly be meeting my needs instead of me serving them, I'm on a quick slope to violating boundaries and ethics, even if we don't mean to. (Check out https://www.keepingoursacredtrust.org for more information and an informative training on this). Third, what happens when you leave? It is hard enough for pastors and congregations when there is a pastoral change - but what happens if they feel that they aren't just losing a pastor but losing a best friend? How will this possibly hinder the ministry of the person who is following you (who we always need to be thinking of as pastors).
    We need relationships. We are made for relationships. But they need to be healthy relationships - where we can be fully ourselves and not "pastor" and relationships that do not even appear to violate any boundaries.

Saturday, July 16, 2016

Treasure in Heaven

The Lord’s Prayer. Powerful words that we pray each and every Sunday. Powerful words that I know many of you pray daily. But have you ever stopped to consider exactly what we are praying together with this prayer? Have you ever thought about what Jesus is trying to teach us not just about nature of prayer, and how to pray, but about the Kingdom of God with these particular words.
We are now in our third week of exploring some of the stories found in the Gospel of Matthew. Jesus is the Gospel of Matthew found teaching through stories and parable to be crucial to his ministry. He certainly healed people in the text and performed miracles, but Jesus spent more time in the gospel of Matthew instructing the disciples then in the other three Gospel writings. Specifically, Jesus was intent to instruct those who gathered around him about the Kingdom of God. 
Today’s text starts off with Jesus teaching about prayer. In fact Jesus doesn’t start of with the philosophy behind prayer, he simply tells the disciples how to be in an attitude of prayer. Remember that the Gospel of Matthew is written to a primary Jewish audience - they are used to stories from the Hebrew Scriptures about leaders who prayed for them as a people and are used to hearing the great prayers of the Psalmists - but this is a different type of prayer - a personal prayer between them and God. Further, note that in comparing those hearing the teaching to the Gentiles, Jesus is not condemning the Gentiles - that simply isn’t Matthew’s audience here so he is using them as a contrasting point of comparison. 
We are to pray in a way that is simple and straight forward. We are to tell God what is honestly on our hearts. Prayer isn’t about seeking attention or who can talk the longest or getting all the words right. Prayer is about communicating with God. We pray in order to be in deep relationship with God. 
One of my favorite praise songs isn’t sung very often. Maybe because its not upbeat. Maybe because it just isn’t known very well. But its entitled ‘If I Could Just Sit With You Awhile’. “If I could just sit with you a while. If you could just hold me. Nothing could touch me though I’m wounded, though I die. If I could just sit you a while, I need you to hold me, moment by moment until forever passes by.” Friends, we have a holy, loving, God who invites us to just come and sit in prayer. To cry. To be silent. To express our heart’s joy. To tell God about our day. And to be loved. That is the attitude we approach prayer with.
At the same time, Jesus is teaching us to pray for big things - not just empty requests that we feel like we have to say. This can be a scary prayer to pray. Maybe you don’t want God to actually occupy all of your life. Maybe you want to hang on to control. So you don’t think about the boldness in the request “Thy Kingdom Come”. You avoid praying it in your own prayers, yet alone praying it first and foremost and instead settle for smaller requests. Personal wants and desires. What is God grants our heartfelt prayer to have the Kingdom of God come? What would that mean in our lives? In our town? In our nation? In our world? Our God invites us to make this request. Our Lord instructs us to pray in this way, that the Kingdom of God come and be known among us! Praise be to God! Do we believe our request will be granted? Do we pray as if it is coming? Or do we simply recite the words, not seeing and believing the power behind them? Jesus tells us not only to pray that the Kingdom of God come, but that God’s will be done. But once again, do we realize the power behind what we are praying? Time and time again in scripture we see the disciples just not getting it. They expect Jesus to come and overthrow the Roman government, even though Jesus came to overthrow the power of sin and death. They expect him to be a conquering King, not a humble Messiah. The walked with Christ for three years and still didn’t get what the will of God was.
God wants us to pray prayers that have the power to change the course of history. God wants us to ask for big things for the Kingdom on Heaven and Earth. But we shy away from this. Maybe because we are afraid that we will be disappointed, or that the answer will be no. We don’t want to take that risk, so we’d rather not pray for big things, life changing things at all. I think we all can tell stories of times we have pleaded with God for something and haven’t received the answer we wanted. And brothers and sisters, I can’t tell you why that happens, it is the way of God. But even if I don’t understand God’s ways, I do know that we are encouraged to keep praying for these big things, because sometimes God answers yes to our requests and lives are truly transformed.
God doesn’t just want us to pray prayers that can change the course of history, but also prayers that can change our very hearts. We can probably all think of someone who has hurt us. Someone who has wronged us. Someone who owes us something - maybe a thank you or an apology. Maybe something much more. Some of us are carrying around the weight of wounds from several years ago. The wounds of debts that we feel that someone owes us. Maybe you even have a list of “should haves”. People that should have treated you differently. But have you ever stopped to consider the times that you have been on someone else’s debt list? Times that you have hurt someone else?  Brothers and sisters, when we pray “Forgive us our debts as we have been forgiven” we remember the powerful truth of the cross. We remember the undeserved and unearned grace that we received through Jesus Christ and we desire to show others that grace, letting it shine through our lives.  We cannot control what other’s do with the forgiveness we offer them, we are simply admonished to forgive. To not let things eat us up or define us, for in the end that will harm us even more.  When we pray this prayer, we remember the people that we have hurt in our lives. We seek reconciliation. But even if they do not forgive us we know we are forgiven by God.
But Jesus didn’t just teach people about prayer, he went on to link it to acts of devotion. Remember that we often miss the links in Jesus’s teachings because we read bits and pieces about them or expound on smaller chunks in Bible Study or on Sunday morning. But Jesus kept teaching after presenting the Lord’s Prayer. He spoke about how to fast as well, and how fasting, like prayer, should be done in a way not to attract attention but rather to connect deeply with God. 
The final piece of this teaching I want to look at this morning is one that we rarely connect with prayer - our treasure. Treasure is defined as anything that is of value to us. There are some things that seem to have universal value - property, money, etc. But there are other things that we highly value for their personal memories for us. Treasure is more than something that has a monetary value, it can have an emotional value as well. 
Jesus teaches to not store up our treasure here, on this earth. And that is a really hard teaching we can consider another day. He says instead to store it up in the Kingdom of God. In ancient society treasure was stored in places, temples, shrine - the royal dwelling place. For us the royal dwelling place of our God and King in heaven. But here is the important line in this teaching “where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
Do you pray about what you treasure most? Do you pray that others will be blessed with what you treasure? Do you treasure things like forgiveness, mercy, all being fed, and God’s Kingdom coming, as expressed in the Lord’s prayer? Or do you often find yourself focused more on the here and now - gaining what you think you need. What would it look like if we took time to consider if what we treasure is the same thing God treasures? How can our hearts and attitudes about treasure be changed through praying the Lord’s Prayer? Lord, change us we pray. Amen. 



Monday, July 11, 2016

#HealthyPastor - Emotionally

   There have been several studies over the years that have found that pastors have a rate of depression as high as the general public (1 out of 4) or even higher. There have been several reasons attributed to these statistics, least of not is the stress of the job and the expectations of other people.
   But I want to take a moment and weave the two together - pastors have become the punching bags for people in some congregations, at least emotionally. Some people don't express themselves well, so when they disagree with a sermon (or what they thought a sermon said) or a decision, instead of coming and discussing it, they either cause havoc in the congregation or come and lay into the pastor about everything they have done wrong - all under the guise of being helpful.
   Let's call it what this is - bullying. We have have too many emotional bullies in our congregations for too long, and pastors have to deal with them more than anyone else. In some cases, they push pastors out and make them move on, other times they wear away until they destroy the pastor from the inside out.
   I like to believe the best in people, so I have to think that most people who behave this way don't actually know that they are doing it, yet how are healthy pastors to respond.
   First, get trained. In my annual conference their is a great program called Tending the Fire (http://centerformation.org). Find out how to lead your congregation in a healthy way.
  Second, get help. Check out what resources are available through your conference and insurance. My spiritual director recently suggested that I find someone to talk about stress in the workplace, and I ran across a wonderful resource offered through my health insurance called EAP (www.liveandworkwell.com). I called someone to chat and they gave me resources around stress I had never received before and were able to affirm some of the positive steps I had already taken.
   Three, don't go through it alone. Find a friend, a family member, or a colleague and talk with them about what is going on and how it is making you feel. You are not the first person to deal with emotional bullies in the church, but it is going to effect you. Find someone to talk it through with so that you aren't carrying the burden alone.

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Matthew 5: 1-16 ‘The Beatitudes”

“Blessed are” followed by the situations most of us would never choose to be in. Would never want to be in. Blessed are the poor in spirit. Those who mourn. The meek. The list goes on and on. Jesus, in this series of teachings referred to as the Sermon on the Mount, speaks startling words. In these particular teachings, in the words of theologian Larry Bouchard, we find that “God’s reign interrupts the usual expectations of life”.
We are now in the second week of our sermon series on the stories of the faith found in the Gospel of Mathew. We have found Jesus speaking about the Kingdom of God above all us and redefining exactly what that Kingdom means, even for us, here, now, today. 
Jesus begins the sermon on the mount with the Beatitudes, or blessings. Blessings were used to show the favor of God and curses or woes to express God’s displeasure. Some of the greatest blessings God could bestow during biblical times were around family and land. To have a large family, especially sons, and an abundance of crop. But if blessings show God’s favor, how many of us would consider these beatitudes to be blessings in our own lives? I think many of us would actually consider what Jesus is saying to be more of a woe then a blessing. Even those that are are not as intense in emotion as those who mourn, are not looked upon well in today’s society - the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers, the persecuted. 
The truth is deep down inside many of us want the opposite of what the beatitudes are expressing. We want to be rich, successful, powerful. We want to be the ones on top of the world, without a care. It is as if with teaching, Jesus is redefining what it means to be in God’s favor. It’s not what we think it is. It is not being the most popular. Or having the biggest church. Or having the fanciest programs. Its about seeking peace, being meek, being merciful. Not the most popular things by the world’s standards, but are reflections of the heart of Jesus Christ. 
For far too long we have tried to take Jesus’s teachings and lay them over the ideals of culture. But brothers and sisters, that simply won’t work. Because there are too many areas were they are simply atitetical. They won’t meld together no matter how hard you shove. For a period of time, especially in the 1950s and 1960s, it seemed like we could make a go of it - the church and the world’s standards being melded together, but in the end, we found that it couldn’t work, because the church, reflecting the heart of Jesus, was more about embedding the beatitudes then power and success, and we drift far from the heart of the gospel message when we forget that truth. We are to be transformed by the heart of Christ, not transformed by the other ideals. 
In a way, the beatitudes were a gift to the disciples and to those gathered at the foot of the mountain. They are a gift that reminds us that above all, God’s ways aren’t the same as our ways - so we need to make a choice - will we follow our own path or God’s? And they are a gift because they free us from trying to be like everyone else - trying to fit in to a mold of success that was never meant for us. They free us to live differently, intentionally, so that other’s may see the light of Christ shining through us. 
Which is exactly where Jesus went next in his sermon on the mount. In many of our Bibles there are breaks in the text in big bold letters, which help us focus on topics or scriptures that go together. But in this particular text those big bold letters can be a hinderance - causing us to forget that these verses, were part of one teaching together. Jesus moves right from the blessings, the Beatitudes, to talking about what it means to be salt and light. 
I used to teach at a mini-camp for students in the northern part of the annual conference. One year, we were learning about the sermon on the mount and for one of the lessons I gave the students flashlight. We talked about this passage about being salt and light and what it means to share our light with the world. And those kids - starting in fourth grade got it, they got it church! They understood that that Jesus was using us, all of us, as vessels to shine forth the light of God. A light that had already changed some of their lives! 
In the ancient world people under stood how important salt and light were. Salt was the chief way of perceiving food. It was used in worship. It was a small thing of great worth. Light was also important. It dictated when people could work. Illuminated what they could see. Both salt and light were ordinary things that had extraordinary importance. 
Sometimes we forget just how important the gift we have to share as the church is. We have the light and love of Jesus Christ. We have a message that cannot be contained. Yet, at times thats exactly what we try to do - especially when we try to fit in with everyone else. We stop looking for opportunities to share the love of Jesus and start looking for ways that we can be just as successful as everyone else. We stop trying to reach out to new people to share Christ’s love with and start thinking that we are good enough as we are. The result, church, is us hiding our light and losing our flavor. 
I love the word choice of Jesus in this section of his teaching. He isn’t saying we should be salt and light, or that we will be salt in light, rather that we are. We are salt and light. By virtue of our faith in Christ we are sent forth to share the message with the world. Because we have been adopted into the family of God, we have a task to share the life-giving love of Jesus with others!
One of my professors told the story that every time he goes out in public – even to buy something as simple as socks for his feet – salespeople recognize him as a preacher. He is not a well-known man even inside the circle of the church, yet alone outside of its community. He does not wear a cross around his neck and he dresses like any other working person. But people recognize something inside of him that he cannot escape from – he is a preacher. Oh that we would live in such a way that those around us would know that we are Christians. Live is such a way that pushes aside the standards of blessing that the world holds – of popularity, wealth, and health, and pick up the radical cross and immerse ourselves in this peculiar way of living. A way that is just as peculiar today as it was when Jesus spoke it over the disciples sitting at his feet. Some may say that we are foolish. Others may say that it is impossible – but we know that it is not. For our Lord and Savior walked the very path of blessing that he laid out to be our example – to show us that it can be done. One step at a time – one blessing at a time. For you are blessed.

Friday, July 8, 2016

Historic Examination - Be Punctual and Be Diligent

Question: Will you observe the following directions?
a.) Be diligent. Never be unemployed. Never be triflingly employed. Never trifle away time; neither spent any more time at any one place than is strictly necessary.
b.) Be punctual. Do everything exactly at the time. And do not mend our rules, but keep them; not for wrath, but for conscience' sake.
Answer: Yes.

I call these the practical ministry questions of the historical examination. Essentially will you do what you say you are going to do with integrity.

Once again, however, these questions can be abused. I know pastors that feel like they have to fill every moment of every day or they are trifling away time, which leaves them feeling exhausted and after a period of time, resentful about their ministry. Here are the wonderful instructions my DS has given me about time: In addition to your Sabbath, you need one day a week off (whenever possible) simply to run errands and do what you need to do. Divide your day up into three sections - morning, afternoon, and evening - and don't work all three sections. In the event that something gets canceled, don't rush to fill in that time, but instead see it as a good gift from God to rest. Don't work every evening during your work week. You need free evenings once in a while to simply be, spending time with family and resting.

Friends, we are called to hard but wonderful work, but often we make it even harder because we insist that we need to do everything and be on the go all the time. No. This is not what we are being asked to do, either by the denomination or by God.

Being punctual is also about being practical. I was sharing with a few colleagues at annual conference that I was much later than I anticipated in picking up my lay delegate because I got held up at a visitation where the gentleman was very chatty with concerns that were weighing on him. My lay delegate completely understood, even though I wasn't punctual in that instance. One of my colleagues shared how he was firmly addressed by his PPRC for being 1 minute late to a meeting. I share with him that for me, my lay delegate understood that a.) being late is completely out of character for me - I am usually the person who shows up early b.) I give approximate times I will be at places knowing that I need to leave room for travel and things running a bit late and c.) sometimes things are beyond your control and you need to live into the ministry moment God is blessing you with.

Let's be practical, friends, in how we approach ministry so that we can run this race with endurance.

This concludes our series on the United Methodist Historical Examination.

Thursday, July 7, 2016

Historic Examination - Debt

Question: Are you in debt so as to embarrass you in your work?
Answer: No

   This question bothers me every time it is asked during annual conference for several reasons. First, it is usually asked with a wink and a nod from the bishop - essentially acknowledging that the conference knows that many of us are carrying an embarrassing amount of debt. There are also giggles from some of those answering the historic questions - showing that they know they can't answer this question truthfully, and then everyone together says "No" - meaning that some are lying.

  Debt is the dirty little secret of many pastors today. Even with wonderful tuition matching programs for seminaries - seminary is expensive. Personally, I was blessed to have all of my tuition and fees covered for seminary, but I still had to pay for housing in NJ - which was expensive. On top of that pastors sometimes live beyond their means - because we don't make very much - which leads to credit card debt, car debt, mortgages on houses we don't live in, etc. We have debt.

  Now, debt is a normal part of life, perhaps not good but normal. So this question is essentially asking if you are in so much debt that it plagues you - and that amount is different for each of us. Are you in so much debt that you can't tithe? Are you in so much debt that you are living paycheck to paycheck? Are you in so much debt that you can't give to your church's capital campaign? That is an extremely personal question. But you have to take time to examine your finances and figure out if you are drowning instead of just writing all debt off as normal.

   Flip side for congregations - pay your pastors fairly. I have heard absolutely awful things from congregations concerning pastors salaries. First off, in my particular tradition, in order to be ordained, you need 4 years of undergrad and a minimum of a 3 year Masters of Divinity Degree (which is a cross between a masters degree and a professional degree), as well as a minimum of 2 years of supervised ministry in order to be ordained and in full connection. That's a lot of education. Further, some pastors are provided with a parsonage, however, in some cases these are not the homes that we would choose. Rather, they are provided because we are itinerant and move when the bishop says move, which does not leave time for house hunting. Between my first and second appointment I had 3 weeks notice - without a parsonage I would not have been able to move and start that appointment well. Lastly, while pastors are certainly not in ministry for the money, they do need to be able to live. While some congregations look at the cost of the total package - including healthcare and pension - and try to adjust the wage in order to bring the total down - this is not how it is done. Most jobs in the "real world" include healthcare and some sort of pension and the wage is not adjusted down because of these numbers. Please think about paying your pastors family and not arguing about how high you believe his or her wage is - it is very uncomfortable, and do not try go get the most out of your pastor for the least amount of money.

  Check back on #healthypastor Mondays in August, for a further post about finances. 

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Historic Examination - Spiritual Disciplines

Question: Will you recommend fasting or abstinence, both by precept and example?
Answer: Yes

 One of my areas of interest for the Church is spiritual formation. It lead me to pursue additional certification at seminary and from the general church concerning spiritual formation in congregations. What I have found is there are certain spiritual disciplines that most people are willing to engage in - chiefly prayer, worship, and reading the scriptures. There are some that start to make people uncomfortable - tithing. And then there are others that people simply don't understand so they come up with a long list of reasons not to even engage those particular spiritual disciplines at all - like fasting and abstinence.

When I was in college I took a 3 week course on spiritual disciplines and we had to try them all in a way that was meaningful to us. Fasting from food wasn't a good idea for me at that time, so I fasted from something I did every day - or rather used every day - the media. I fasted from the internet and movies and music for 12 hours one day. It was transformative. We fast and abstain in order to realize how much certain things have control over us, how much power we give to them, and then during the time of our day we would normally spend doing those particular things, we are in prayer.

I have friends and colleagues who fast every week. I have others who fast when something big is happening in their lives and ministries. But notice that there is a second part of this particular question - we recommend both by teaching, but also by example. This gets a little tricky because most people believe in fasting in secret, which is wonderful, but as pastors we need to figure out a way to use ourselves and the spiritual disciplines we engage as an example for our congregation in order to make it more approachable.

At the heart I think this question isn't just asking if we will instruct congregations about fasting and abstinence, but about spiritual disciplines in general, so that we can grow in our faith walk.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Historic Examination - Instruction and Visitation

Questions: Will you diligently instruct the children in every place? Will you visit from house to house?
Answer: Yes

   These two questions tend to give me pause, even though on the surface they are quite simple. Mostly because I don't think John Wesley could anticipate how they have been morphed over the years to look and mean something completely different from his intention.
   When we instruct the children in every place we are teaching them about the faith. When children haven't grown up in a Christian home, they need adults to teach them about the love of Jesus. There are some beautiful ways that churches do this today - Vacation Bible School, Sunday School, Children's Messages, Children's Church. Here we started a story time with the pastor on the parsonage porch one day a week. But how this can be misinterpreted is to say that it is only the children who need instruction, which simply isn't true. Children need a special type of instruction, but that does not preclude adults of any age and any stage of their faith journey from needing instruction as well. Faith is a lifelong process and we are never done.
   Visitation from house to house used to act as that form of instruction for households, hence the imploring to visit from house to house. But today we have mis-interpreted this as well. At my last appointment there were over 100 households of folks who were some sort of regular-esque attenders. I had a gentleman who wanted me to visit all of these households once every 6 months at the least, once a quarter if possible. It wasn't possible. If the pastor only visited from house to house they would not be able to do the rest of their job let alone hold up the rest of the historic questions being discussed.
   Instruction and visitation is not the job of the pastor alone - we need partners in the congregation who uphold these vital ministries. We are better together as ministers for Christ.

Monday, July 4, 2016

#HealthyPastor - Care for the Body

  The other day I had a meeting with the DS and afterwards I bopped into the restroom to change into running shorts and a t-shirt. I came out and was talking to the DS's awesome administrative assistant and she stopped mid-sentence and just looked at me before asking if I had went into the bathroom to change. I told her yes, I had a free hour and I wanted to go for a walk, but not in my dress clothes.
   Something I have been toying around with lately is the idea of what it means to be a healthy pastor. What it mean to be holistically healthy, so that I can serve God to the best of my abilities. But extending this concept beyond myself to my colleagues as well.
   The truth is in so many ways pastor can be unhealthy. We have a busy and stressful job that demand a lot of time sitting and often having meals on the go, which tend not to be very healthy. For the past month, I have been embarking on an adventure to try to make good choices. Because the truth is we make certain choices every day that effect our health. If we are going to get enough rest. How we are going to schedule our day. What we are going to eat. If we are going to exercise.
   Being healthy can be overwhelming so we need to take small steps, make small choices that we can celebrate. Some examples: this past week I knew I was quite busy, especially since I was in the second week of VBS. So I tried to block out one hour each day when I could exercise. It wasn't the same time every day, but one hour, at some point, that was my time to take care of me. An appointment to exercise if you will. Wednesday was particularly busy, so the only time I had was after my meeting with the DS, but before VBS, so I took that hour to walk around the area and explore. I took pictures along the way to make it fun, an adventure of sorts. The days I walk indoors, I have found a program I enjoy, that makes me want to exercise - Walk at Home with Leslie Sansone, find what works best for you.
   : Wednesday I knew I had to eat lunch on the go, so I thought about where I would want to eat and looked up the menu before hand to make the best choices. I have food allergies so I tend to have to look up menus prior to going to a place anyway, but its a good habit for all of us to get into if we can.
   : Pack water. I always have nalgenes of water with me when I travel in the car. It keeps me hydrated and ready to go.
   : Have accountability. I have had my fitbit for a year now and I love it. It holds me accountable to my steps, but it also allows me to challenge friends to steps, making a game out of holding each other accountable.

   How are you working towards being a #healthypastor - caring for your body?

Historic Examination - Compassion

  Question: Will you exercise the ministry of compassion?
  Answer: Yes

  The dictionary defines compassion as a deep feeling of sympathy or sorrow for someone who is stricken by misfortune. But for Christians it is compassion that spurs us towards acts of kindness and mercy - or showing love to another person.
  Some days it is hard to show compassion to people. When you are being chewed out for something you didn't do or a misunderstanding has escalated, it can be hard to look at another person with compassion and wonder what is going on in their personal life that has caused them to react to you in this way. It can be hard to have compassion when you have people asking for things and money day after day and you have to sort through who needs the limited resources you have the most. Yet as Christians we are called to show compassion, no matter what the circumstances.
 

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Temptations

Matthew 4: 1-17 Temptations 07/03/16

“And now we’re lost in the wilderness. Lost, crying in the wilderness. And if anyone’s watching it seems they couldn’t care less. We’re lost in the wilderness.” Pointed words sung by an actor portraying Cain in the 1998 musical Children of Eden. But pointed words that effect us here, today, in this moment as well. 
This week we are beginning a sermon series on some of the stories of our faith that are found in the gospel of Matthew. The gospel of Matthew was written to a primary Jewish audience, those who would have known the Hebrew scriptures inside and out. Those who could identify Jesus as the Messiah they had been waiting, longing, for. Up to this point in the gospel, Jesus has been born, visited by the wisemen from afar, has had to escape to Egypt in order to avoid being killed by King Herod, and has been baptized by his cousin, John the Baptist. 
We pick up on Jesus’s story today in an unlikely place - the wilderness. While today we think of the wilderness as a place to retreat to in order to find refreshment, the words from the song “Lost in the Wilderness” remind us that this idilic picture does not portray the wilderness of scripture - a deserted place, maybe not a desert, but a wasteland of sorts. 
As soon as Matthew’s hearers would have heard the word wilderness, they would have been taken back to their history, the roots of their faith and the family - that story of the Israelites wondering in the dessert for forty years before reaching the promised land. But while Israelites wondering was a test from God that they stumbled through, at best, this testing of Jesus would be different. This time of testing would prove to us - prove to Matthew’s audience - that Jesus is truly the Son of God who can conquer anything.
One after another Jesus faced the tempter who asked him to prove that he was the Son of God by going against God - by commanding stones to become bread, by throwing himself off of the highest point in order to have the angels of God catch him, and to worship the Devil in order to be given the Kingdoms of the world. But each time, Jesus pushed aside the temptation he was facing by bringing his focus back to the Word of God. Jesus conquered temptation by focusing on God alone. 
Friends, this scripture isn’t important just because it is the beginning of Jesus’s ministry. It is not important just because it helps prove Jesus’s Messiahship. It’s also important because the temptations that Jesus faced back then are the same ones we face everyday in one form or another. Jesus’s temptations foreshadow our temptations as well.
The reality is that we all give into temptation. We all sin. But it has become taboo, even in church, to talk about being tempted by Satan. We would like to pretend that we have the power to control ourselves. That no outside force could ever make us go astray, when this simply is not true. We are tempted every day to focus on our own interest and aims instead  of God. We are tempted to take the good gifts God has blessed us with and turn them into idols. We are tempted to survive by our own power alone. 
We are disciples and the Church universal face this  temptation of power today, only sometimes we don’t fare as well as Christ in overcoming it. We try to create our own version of the gospel story, by focusing solely on the message of Good Friday (the death of sin) without the glory of Easter (so that we can be raised to new life) or vise versa. Some disciples want the promise of the Kingdom of God without the cross, and others want just the cross and no hope in Earth and Heaven. Or we focus on the afterlife in Heaven without talking about the courageous life of faith Jesus modeled for us to live. When we cherry pick what we want the gospel to be about, we have given into the temptation of placing our own order, our own control, our own understanding, over God’s message.
So how do we confront the temptations we face? What wisdom can we glean from Matthew’s account of the temptation of Christ? For Christ such preparation came in knowing the scriptures. Satan quoted scriptures to him out of context, to try to make his own point, and Jesus replied with scriptures quoted in context, making God’s point. This temptation sequence came between Jesus baptism and ministry. It wasn’t just a blip in his life. Temptations never are. 
We also need to take account of our own lives and in order to honestly assess when we are most vulnerable to temptation. For most us, temptation comes on the strongest when we are in the wilderness of life. When we sense that we are all alone. When we are struggling - with family issues, work issues, marital issues, financial issues.  Here’s the truth folks, when we are in the wilderness of life, some of us can be prone to making bad choices. It’s one of the realities of the wilderness. But it’s also in the midst of the wilderness that we have opportunity after opportunity to ground ourselves in the love of Christ and claim our identity as children of God. 
Another song from the Children of Eden musical has God proclaiming to Adam and Eve, “where there is choice there is pain.” That’s most true when we don’t have our priorities straight. When we think that taking what seems like the easy path is the best choice, even when it leads us away from God or is contrary to God’s word. Let’s be honest for a moment - those type of choices don’t end well. Instead, we need to choose again and again to walk in the path that leads to light - the light of Jesus Christ. 
But Pastor Michelle, what type of Good News is that? What hope is to be found in the message that we all face temptations and have to make choices? The Good News, friends, that we do not walk through this life journey alone. The Good News that even in the wilderness, even in the chaos, even in the darkness, God is with us and God has blessed us with the Word to guide us, even when life is hard. 

Bad news and the wilderness surround us, even here today. And in the midst of that wilderness is temptation.The thing that we don’t want to talk about, because all too often we cave into our desires. The thing we don’t want to talk about because it brings back memories of shame. Or perhaps the thing that we don’t want to talk about because we really don’t want to change. But simply avoiding to talk about temptation does not make it go away. We will constantly be tempted. And how we respond to Satan testing us defines who we are as children of God who are called to minister to the world. So let us leave this place, strengthened by the Word of God, to face the wilderness of life and proclaim the Good News - by God’s strength and power - not our own - we will make it through. We will not be lost in the wilderness. Amen. 

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Historical Examination - Doctrine and Polity

Questions: Have you studied the doctrine of the United Methodist Church? After full examination do you believe that our church doctrines are in harmony with the Holy Scriptures? Have you studied our form of Church discipline and polity? Do you approve our Church government and polity? Will you support and maintain them?
Answer: Yes

Doctrine is a statement of what we believe as a church. Polity is the form of governance we have to help us live into what we believe. This series of questions we have many people struggle with.

When I first arrived at my current appointment, the PPRC had said they wanted someone who would uphold and follow the Book of Discipline - or the book that explains our doctrine and polity. While this was probably referring to tension around the LGBTQA discussion in the UMC, I am a firm believer that we do not simply follow part of the Discipline, or follow the rule but ignore the Spirit. If we are going to follow the Discipline, we are going to follow the Discipline to the best of our ability.

Recently, I was approached about nominations and positions of leadership at the local church level. We had implemented the requirements around term limits and their was question about why we did this when the local church had voted to set aside those term limits. But the Discipline does not allow for the local church to vote in such a way. If we are going to follow the Discipline, we are going to follow the Discipline to the best of our ability.

On the other hand, questions need to be asked about both the Book of Discipline and the Book of Resolutions if they are in line with our corporate understanding of who God is and how the Spirit is moving amongst us. Are they concerned with seeking justice, loving mercy, and walking humbly with our God? This is where there is a lot of struggle right now.

I don't have the right answers. I don't have any answers most days. And I cannot speak for every elder in the church. I simply live into the tension, while knowing for this moment in time, I am to uphold the Book of Discipline, while praying and seeing where the Spirit leads the corporate church, because this is what I promised to do at my ordination.

Friday, July 1, 2016

Historic Examination - The General Rules

Question: Do you know the General Rules of our Church? Will you keep the General Rules of our church?
Answer: Yes (though my bishop always adds - what are they?)

There are many pieces of United Methodist doctrine and polity that I deeply appreciate as one who is invested and interested in spiritual formation. Amongst those pieces are the General Rules - known more recently by the title Bishop Job gave them - three simple rules.

On one hand, the general rules of the church are quite simple - Do no harm. Do good always. Stay in love with God. Yet, on the other hand, they can be so complicated to live into.

The summer of my first year of appointed ministry I was commuting back and forth to a hospital 2 hours away for Clinical Pastoral Education - a wonderful program that helps you both become more comfortable with visitation but also, and perhaps more importantly, address your own internal issues that can become stumbling blocks to being an effective and healthy pastor. While there I came to appreciate how hard the Hippocratic oath can be for doctors - sometimes its not easy to tell what is causing harm to your patient and what is not. So it is with doing no harm. Sometimes we confuse doing no harm with keeping everyone happy, which both isn't realistic and isn't effective ministry. The same issue arises, but looks a bit differently, with do good always. Are we seeking to not create any stumbling blocks for people that could hinder their relationship with Christ?

It can also be hard to stay in love with God as a pastor. If you are always the one leading worship, what do you do to worship God? If you are constantly in the Word but are doing so to prepare a message or sermon for someone else, where are you being fed by Scripture? Pastors need to be intentional about staying connected to the life source, Jesus Christ, every single day.

The general rules are helpful because they steer us towards what it means to be a disciple in our every day lives.