Help Our Unbelief - John 20: 19-31

I never really understood why Thomas got a bad reputation or why he was singled out for the nickname “doubter.” Ten of the disciples were locked inside of a house, hiding together out of fear what might happen to them at the hands of those who had killed their Lord. Yet, Thomas was brave enough to not be hiding with them. He was brave enough to venture beyond the locked door. Yet we never mention that each year when this passage is preached. Or what about the fact that everyone but Thomas had an encounter with the risen Christ that lead them to believe - Mary Magdeline did. The other ten disciples did. They believed after seeing and talking with Christ and receiving their orders in mission for the Kingdom of God. Thomas was simply left out and demanded what everyone else had received. Yet we do not talk about that either.

Each year a sermon is usually preached belittling Thomas for not believing what he did not see. As if Thomas sinned by wanting the same opportunity as everyone else. But Thomas’ biggest problem is not that he doubted Jesus because he did not see. Rather, what truly gets him labeled a doubter is that he does not believe ten men whom he lived with for three years, ministered with, ate with, and loved as close friends. He did not trust the people whom he was closest with to speak the truth in his life. Thomas will not believe that what they say is true unless he sees it for himself.

This was not a demand unheard of in the gospels up to this point. Time after time in the healing narratives, people believed after they witnessed Jesus healing someone. After he restored loved ones to wholeness. But Thomas wasn’t rejecting the news from someone who had only seen Jesus heal once or twice. He was rebuking close colleagues and friends, saying that their account was not good enough. Their eyes and fingers weren’t enough proof for him. He had to experience the risen Christ himself. 

A few weeks ago in Wednesday Bible Study we had a discussion centered around speaking the truth about how God is working into the lives of people we know and care about. Identifying the ways that God has blessed them and telling them what you witness, what you have seen take place. Has anyone told you how God has blessed you? Have you ever told anyone how God has blessed them? The group members spoke time and time again about how they know God is working in other people’s lives, they just haven’t told them.

The Disciples told Thomas about what they had witnessed, and he did not believe them. I think many of us do not share what we witness in other’s lives because we are afraid we will suffer the same rebuke as the disciples, with people wanting to see for themselves. We live in a time when everything is suspect, and things are rarely believed without first hand experiences. And we easily doubt anything that makes us uncomfortable. Yet our faith asks us to trust the word of others. To trust what faithful people tell us about God working in and through us. 

The first person I remember telling me firmly that I was called by God to the work of the church was a pastor. I doubted his word because I did not want it to be true. The second was a group of people who saw me at an event for those exploring ministry. I chewed them out at a meeting critiquing the event and said that I would never be ordained. When we receive truth through the eyes and voices of the faithful, we reject it, like Thomas, if it isn’t what we want to hear. If we haven’t experienced the truth for ourselves.

But the rest of the Disciples were doubters just as much as Thomas, just in a different way. They didn’t trust what their Lord had told them throughout their time together. That Jesus would be persecuted, put to death, but that he would return after he had gone away. That his peace would come and dwell with them and the Spirit would be gifted to them. They might have heard Jesus say these things, many of which were said time and time again, yet they didn’t expect them to happen. They didn’t expect them to be true. They didn’t trust the one who speaks the ultimate truth, the Word made Flesh. 

Perhaps the true message of this gospel text cannot be summed up neatly in the nickname “doubting Thomas”, but rather the doubting disciples. And friends, are we not all part of the doubting group at one time or another? Don’t we doubt when we receive a word spoken over us that we do not want to hear. Or when we don’t quite believe that Jesus will respond to our prayers. Don’t we all doubt when we don’t know if our faith is quite worth sharing with others or anticipate a negative reaction? 

Perhaps the true lesson for us is that while we doubt, Jesus remains faithful. While we doubt, we are still given the Holy Spirit  and the Peace of Christ. Even when we test Christ, as Thomas did, saying if this happens then I will believe, Christ remains faithful. Even when we cannot feel Christ with us or see him with our eyes, it is still the breathe of God that breathed into dust and brought it to life, and it is still the breath of the risen Christ who bestows the Holy Spirit. Even when we disbelieve it is still the life breath of the Spirit moving in and through us. 

And it is that same breath when we emerge from our doubts that enables us  to cry out “My Lord and my God!”

And that’s the beauty of this story is - we can understand it. We can place ourselves in it. At the Lenten Bible study a conversation ensued about how people could disbelieve Christ when he walked among them in the flesh and they could directly see what he did. But if they doubted, can’t we admit that we do from time to time as well? And can’t it make us better understand and minister to a world that doubts as well? Does not the experience of doubting allow us to tell the story of how we emerged from our doubt and how we were finally able to believe Christ and to believe the words of the faithful followers who spoke truth into our lives? And do we truly walk by faith at all times, or are their instances, when just like Thomas, we want the signs that so many others have received? 

Friends,  even when we have unbelief, God provides for us and meets us in our moments of need, just as he did with Thomas. Do we not trust that God will reach out to us with the same love and provision? The risen Christ was kind enough to come to the disciples gathered in the rom after they disbelieved Mary’s word. And he was kind enough to return when Thomas needed more proof then the word of his friends. Even when all doubted, Jesus remained faithful. Yes blessed are those who do not need to see or hear directly from the Lord, but we all fall into both categories. Sometimes we want something more and sometimes we so willingly trust and follow Jesus, even when it seems unclear. But, brothers and sisters, today I tell us that the risen Lord is just as faithful to us as he was to the disciples, no matter if we easily believe or want something more. So I ask you, what do you need from him to be able to cry out “My Lord and my God”? Oh Lord, help us to believe. Amen.