Companion for the Journey: Joseph of Bethlehem - Matthew 1: 18-24

When I was little, my brothers and I were privileged to be cared for one day a week by an elderly couple who became like another set of grandparents for us. I have many fond memories of our time at their home, but one of the things I remember most was learning how to put together puzzles. Located instead of the toy room was the man’s table that he used to put together thousand piece jigsaw puzzles. After dinner, sometimes, he would let us gather around the table, lit by a desk lamp so we could see better, and we would try to find the pieces that would fit together, eventually revealing a beautiful picture.

When I think of some of the great narratives about Jesus’ life, I think back to those jigsaw puzzles. Especially with stories like that of Jesus’ birth and death, which have details scattered across the various gospels, I think the church has a tendency to be as impatient as I was as a young child with those puzzles. Instead of trying to find the pieces that fit together, sometimes I would simply shove two pieces together until the cardboard started to bend. While I felt a sense of accomplishment in that moment, for sure enough there were two pieces that were together, that did not mean that the pieces actually went together or would form the picture in its full beauty.

Last week we heard about the Angel of the Lord, Gabrielle, coming to announce to Mary that she was pregnant with the son of God, who was to be called Jesus. Today’s story takes place in the gospel of Matthew, in Bethlehem, some distance from Nazareth. This is important for several reasons. First, it reminds us that Mary’s engagement to Joseph was long distance. He did not reside in Nazareth with Mary, so the marriage was probably arranged by family members. Second, Joseph had to find out about Mary’s pregnancy by some oral means. More then likely, Mary told Joseph herself when she traveled to see her cousin Elizabeth, as she lived only four miles from Bethlehem.

Imagine that you are Joseph. Your marriage has been arranged to a girl from another town. Possibly someone whom you did not know very well. While she was visiting her elderly cousin four miles from you, you are summoned to come and meet her there. While visiting she gives you news that you never expected to hear – she is pregnant, and she is claiming she has still never known a man and the child is the Lord’s. This probably made no sense to you. Even though you grew up in a town known for David, the one whom God had helped do the impossible, the things that did not make sense, like slaying the giant Goliath with only a sling shot and a stone. Even though you had been told that the Messiah would come from one of their own, from the house of David. But these are probably not your first thoughts when you are told that the woman whom you are to spend the rest of your life with is pregnant, and it is not your child.

Imagine wrestling with this information. What will you do? Who will you tell? The scriptures say that Mary should be stoned to death for having a child by another man while engaged to you. But you don’t want her to die. If you tell your family, tell your friends, word will get around Bethlehem – its not that big of a town with only 500 -1,000 people living in it – and she will be executed. But you can’t marry her either. Not when she broke your trust, broke the promise you made to each other through your engagement. They were essentially married to each other by law – all that was left was the ceremony, consummation of the marriage, and starting a life together. Now what?

Scripture doesn’t tell us how long Joseph wrestled with the decision of what to do about his engagement to Mary – only that the angel of the Lord came to him in a dream after he resolved to dismiss her and their engagement quietly. The only logical explanation to Mary’s predicament was that she had been unfaithful to him – but as much as that angered and saddened him, as much as that cut him to his very core, he could not justify killing her. Joseph knew that if he ended the engagement quietly, and then people found out that she was pregnant, that they would assume that he had been the one to impregnate her while she was visiting Elizabeth. The shame of the pregnancy would then be his – for sleeping with someone, whom he was engaged to, then dismissing her, and not being a father to his own child – instead of Mary’s. The consequences were not as life threatening for him, but in an honor-share society, it would bring much disgrace upon him and his family. He would still owe Mary’s family the additional dowry to be paid before their wedding. He would be required by law to provide for the needs of her child, and if Mary really insisted then the law would require him to take her as his wife. Though he doubted that she would do that. This was the honorable thing to do, no matter how much shame it brought upon him and his house – to spare Mary’s life and to allow her to quietly return to her family and be consoled instead of shunned.

But God had other plans. We often think about God picking Mary to be the one to carry the Christ-child, but God just as clearly picked Joseph to be the earthly Father to Jesus, when he interrupted Joseph’s sleep one night with a dream confirming what Mary had told him – that she was carrying the Messiah. That he was still to marry her. That she did not break covenant with him. And Joseph awoke from that dream and did what God said.

I think a lot of us wish that God would intervene in our lives the way he did with Mary – sending an angel to make a direct announcement to us. Telling us what we are doing and how it will affect the world. But for most of us, I believe that God reaches out to us like Joseph. Because most of us are Joseph.

Let me explain what I mean by that. None of the words that Joseph ever said are recorded in scripture. He is barely mentioned at all. He is not mentioned again after Jesus is twelve. And yet, Joseph played a critical part in the upbringing of Jesus. He taught him his own skill – that of carpentry. Joseph was not the master carpenter, in charge of projects throughout the region. He simply worked with his hands, doing honest work, building structures such as doors and roofs fro stone houses. He would have lived by the motto – measure twice, cut once – knowing the importance of quality work that is done well the first time. A hardworking man who took pride in his trade. A humble man who was willing to risk his own personal disgrace in order to save Mary’s dignity and very life. Someone who was obedient to God even when God did not speak as clearly to him as God did to Mary, simply coming to him in a dream. He did not seek to be well known, only to serve the Lord, his God, through the work of his hands the choices he made.

When our lives end, many of us will not have the words we speak recorded in history books. But our lives, like Joseph, will have mattered. By the decisions we make about how to treat people, even when we feel that they have wronged us. By the way that we bring our children up in this world and the lessons that we teach them. By the pride we take in our work and striving to do our best in our area of skill in order to bring glory and honor to God. We may not be the people with the most power and authority in this world, but we do what we are called to do well. Not seeking the limelight. Simply seeking to serve, even if we never receive recognition or praise from others.

And God may never come and speak to us directly, as God did to Mary. But for many of us, God speaks to us through various means, if only we recognize them as a message from God. A dream, a word from a friend, a dark situation that God transformed to bring beauty, light, and clarity. In these less clear forms of communication from God we can see hope and possibilities, even if we know that it will require hard work and risk to bring to fulfillment. We are called to pray over these dreams, to sort out what is from God and what is not, and when required to act.

So most of us are like Joseph. Never going to be as well known as Mary. Never to have our words remembered throughout history. Not having God speak as directly to us. But still called. Still chosen. What is God calling you to do lately? Are you willing to risk whatever you need to in order to obey the call of the Lord or do you keep testing God, telling God that the message needs to be more clear. Are you praying for a Mary moment, while ignoring God’s speaking to you in other ways, like God did with Joseph?

I would challenge you over the coming week to write down those ways that God may be speaking to you – and the messages that God is trying to convey. Pray over them. Is there a theme developing? Is their clarity in God’s persistence that you just were not able to see before? Listen to the voice of God speaking to you in whatever way it comes, discern, and then act. Act boldly. Take risks. No matter what the cost. Live the life that Joseph did. For you life, and the decisions you make, the way you live, matter. You are called. Are you willing and able to listen? Amen.