"Hear Me" (Take These Tears)

Take these tears, put ‘em in a bottle.

Don’t let these tears I cry be in vain.

Take these tears, keep them up in heaven.

Water my life with tears like rain

The past few weeks have been rough. A lot has been happening that has made me reflect on my purpose and call in life. In reflecting upon my past year in ministry, I cannot help but wonder if all of the opposition I’ve been facing is because I’m not where I am supposed to be.

Hear me, hear my words unspoken,

Restore my faith in hopin’

Hear me, I am feeling broken I am broken open.

Pain has never had a universal meaning in my life. Sometimes its to try me and show me my own strength. And other times it’s a sign to move on. But I rarely can identify purpose of the pain in the moment. It is only in retrospect that I can see God’s leading and presence.

Take this life, turn it into something,

I’m afraid it’s just wasting time

Recently, I’ve been feeling like what I’m doing isn’t bearing fruit. When I start to reflect on times in my life when I have felt like my life has been used for something the most, it is not in this setting. That does not mean that God isn’t using this time – it just means that I’m not seeing or feeling it. Which could be blocked by my own exhaustion.

Turn this life the sun has ripened, grow it slowly on the vine.

Turn my tears into wine

Turn my tears into wine, turn these tears into wine

My prayer recently has been for clarity and direction. I don’t want my life to simply just be marking time. I want to make a difference. And if that means moving outside of my training and comfort zone I need some confirmation beyond my dis-ease.

All that’s left of me are traces.

Make me stronger in my broken places

I am feeling moved towards another unit of CPE. I’m feeling moved towards non-profits. But I’m also feeling moved to stay. To keep trying. To not run away. But I’m not sure if I’m blocking myself in by the expectations of myself and others. I don’t want to stay out of fear, but I don’t want to flee in fear either. So direction. And making all of my ministry fruitful, even when I cannot perceive it.

So may this song be my prayer.

Lyrics from: Jim Brickman – "Hear Me" (Take These Tears