Gifts

For the past four months, as an additional aspect for my supervised ministry placement of Biblical Feasting, I've been working at Blooming Grove UCC in the Catskills region of NY. The church is small in numbers, but their communal spirit is ever growing. The church building itself is from the mid to late 1700s, and is beautiful, having a story that is waiting to be told. But with an average worship attendance of 10-15 people, the vastness can quench the spirit of the congregation as they spread out from one another, locked in their pews. So I made a conscious decision at the start of my time there to sit out in the pews with people. I didn't want to be set apart, especially as the intern, where I contribute to 1/10th (usually) of the congregation. I want to hear the sermon preached from the perspectives of others, let the sound of singing reverberate off of my skin. I wanted to be part of the congregation in this setting, not set apart.

Yesterday, Lise (my supervisor) made me sit up with her on the raised platform for the entirety of the service. It felt odd. I've been set apart in my home congregation, but after working at Soul Cafe, I like to sit amongst people and get up to participate when its my turn. Both/ and not either/or.

The same odd uncomfortableness settled on me during the reception that was held for me. There was a presentation of a gift, a beautiful stole that I still need to wait a few years before I am given the authority by my church to wear. And a vase of yellow roses with a beautiful story behind them. The uncomfortableness did not come from being up front to receive the gifts, but being forced to open them in front of people. Since coming back from Russia, I find myself adapting more and more to the custom of opening gifts in secret. I also like to give gifts in secret, outside of doors or sitting out for people. It's a sign of respect to not open a gift in front of the giver, but rather rejoice in the gift of the givers very presence.

I'm not sure how all of this oddness will play out in my coming appointment, but I know that it will. And that we will adapt and grow together.