Struggling

   I'm really struggling to process this IAF class. It is arising emotions in me that are confusing, a tension that I have not felt in a while. On the one hand, I want to believe what everyone else believes, to say that the church isn't doing its job and that we need to organize the power in the institutions to act. But right now the other side of me, the side that comes from my upbringing to point me to who I am going to be, is struggling and rebelling. I don't like the fact that God is discounted. And I disagree that the church isn't doing its job - at least not fully. My optimistic, affirmative, and asset driven eyes see the beauty in the being, not the offense in not being the potential in other's eyes. Beyond that, people are not going to respond if clergy and lay members just stand up and tell them that they are all wrong, not kingdom minded, and just generally are destructive to themselves and others. I sort of wonder what God would think about our discussions of power, our marriage with politics. Is this what I mean when I pray "Thy will be done, Thy Kingdom come?" Because I don't believe in my heart that it is.