Sitting in the Grass

When I was little I hated conflict. I still do in some ways. Its part of the reasons that I dislike organized sports. It all started in elementary school when playground games became this time that people who were once friends became enemies as people played to win at any cost. So I just sat on the grass and read or chatted with people. Or hula-hopped. Or jump roped. Something where I could experience the beauty of a time in community without the manipulation. I never learned to cope with that manipulation. Ever. Maybe it has to do with being in a wonderful family that was like a cocoon of beauty. We played kickball together for fun. We played wiffleball and badminton for fun. There were rules, that were loose at best, and the goal was laughter not to hurt one another. And that translated into life rules - love everyone, do not harm others, and don't put your needs above others. Be respectful. Lev 19:18.

So here I am today. Back in seminary. And back in the places where people try to manipulate each other and get what they want with no thoughts of others. Or respect. And I'm still uncomfortable. Even more so. Because on the playground there is an ethic, but it is self-reliant, not an ethic of Christan com unity. Are we training ministers just to get what they want at any cost? Leaders who no one wants to follow? Or people only want to follow to learn how to get ahead? When will we start to love each other instead of stabbing each other?

Shalom Question

If we say that justice is about mercy missions then how can we ascribe to community based asset development/ organizing?

To be a follower

I am constantly reminded that God is the master weaver. I can see how everything I do fit together is a masterful way. This semester I’m taking supervised ministry, social justice and evangelism, church at worship, shalom, and ethics. I’m working with TSA, in admissions, with a Liberian Children’s Project, TERRA, Composting, and rethinking stock options.

At first glance one has to ask how all of that fits together. But they fit together friends, in their dissimilarities. God is calling me to struggle as if I was creating art. I need to make choices about what color to choose, what stitch to go with, or what word to pen.

Yesterday I had to make a choice about what to believe. Two of my classes started out by talking about the game ‘Follow the Leader’. Supervised ministry started out by asking if we would rather be the leader or follower if we play this childhood game. And I couldn't come up with an answer. Because I loved both. The point of being asked was to say that if we liked to be a leader in the game then we could be a great pastors. But I didn't like to lead or follow. And literally twenty minutes later Len Sweet was able to articulate why in my next class through of all things, twitter. Where it is all about who you are following and who is following you. It's like a circle. And I'm following Jesus. Why have we forgot that to be a leader is to follow and that a leader is also continually a follower.